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Post by Infinity Blade on Apr 20, 2019 23:17:42 GMT 5
Go with a larger size but if the known specimens were well on their way to adulthood (so like say, their species' equivalent to teenagers), then don't make them too much larger (making them a meter longer would sound reasonable).
Didn't Walking with Dinosaurs sometimes go with size estimates that weren't all that certain at the time, like with their "Ornithocheirus" (=Tropeognathus)? Sure, their size estimate didn't survive the test of time (they were, in David Unwin's words, probably trying to make it more "spectacular", which I don't think you're trying to do), but unless you're trying to be as accurate as possible for as long as possible (in which case, ignore my advice), then I personally wouldn't worry about this modest upsize (from a body length standpoint) too much.
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Post by theropod on Apr 21, 2019 0:10:48 GMT 5
I'm a bit undecided on how to depict the adult Liliensternuses in the next chapter. Should I go with 5 m or should I make up a size (presumably 6-7 m), based on the fact that the known specimens are likely juveniles? I think upsizing it to 6-7m wouldn’t be too much of a stretch. Theropods that size likely existed in the Triassic based on the ichnological record (da Silva et al. 2012), although they seem to have been fairly rare. Griffin & Nesbitt (2019) also propose that the largest Triassic theropods could have reached sizes similar to Dilophosaurus or the like when adult. There might even be larger Liliensternus individuals out there, something pretty big has been discovered in Frick recently that has been guesstimated at 6 m, but it’s too early to say whether it really is a Liliensternus and whether that figure might have to be corrected by a meter or so. So this would not really be a speculative upsize trying to make the animal more spectacular, such as the ones the BBC made in WWD, but rather a hypothesis presented in keeping with the literature and trace fossil evidence. It’d be less accurate to show them maxing out at the size we know from immature specimens, although what would be accurate would be to portray the adults are rare, or maybe not even show them or specify their size at all. Like, show a young Liliensternus the size we know from fossils, and maybe hint at a considerably bigger adult, which you can envision as roughly Dilophosaurus-sized, but you might not need to state the precise size figure.
da Silva, R.C., Barboni, R., Dutra, T., Godoy, M.M. and Binotto, R.B. 2012. Footprints of large theropod dinosaurs and implications on the age of Triassic biotas from Southern Brazil. Journal of South American Earth Sciences 39: 16–23.
Griffin, C.T. and Nesbitt, S.J. 2019. Does the maximum body size of theropods increase across the Triassic-Jurassic boundary? Integrating ontogeny, phylogeny, and body size. The Anatomical Record xx (accepted).
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Post by dinosauria101 on Apr 21, 2019 6:25:29 GMT 5
I'm a bit undecided on how to depict the adult Liliensternuses in the next chapter. Should I go with 5 m or should I make up a size (presumably 6-7 m), based on the fact that the known specimens are likely juveniles? I think upsizing it to 6-7m wouldn’t be too much of a stretch. Theropods that size likely existed in the Triassic based on the ichnological record (da Silva et al. 2012), although they seem to have been fairly rare. Griffin & Nesbitt (2019) also propose that the largest Triassic theropods could have reached sizes similar to Dilophosaurus or the like when adult. There might even be larger Liliensternus individuals out there, something pretty big has been discovered in Frick recently that has been guesstimated at 6 m, but it’s too early to say whether it really is a Liliensternus and whether that figure might have to be corrected by a meter or so.
da Silva, R.C., Barboni, R., Dutra, T., Godoy, M.M. and Binotto, R.B. 2012. Footprints of large theropod dinosaurs and implications on the age of Triassic biotas from Southern Brazil. Journal of South American Earth Sciences 39: 16–23.
Griffin, C.T. and Nesbitt, S.J. 2019. Does the maximum body size of theropods increase across the Triassic-Jurassic boundary? Integrating ontogeny, phylogeny, and body size. The Anatomical Record xx (accepted).
Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't Lillensternus too fragmentary to calculate size from? To my knowledge, it's only known from a few meager scraps of bone. |
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Post by Infinity Blade on Apr 21, 2019 6:45:35 GMT 5
I'm in the midst of my second chapter, and I ran into a tiny problem. I was about to write that one of my Tyrannosaurus characters was making a facial expression. This means that if you were to turn my story into an animated series, you'd end up with a more stylized, cartoon-ish animation because, well, dinosaurs did not make facial expressions (anything lacking the appropriate facial musculature is unable to)!
I want to try to be as accurate as I can with my time periods and their organisms, though. But writing it so that the T. rex has a facial expression I think would make the characters seem more relatable. And I mean, the animals are already all talking, so might I as well?
What should I do?
Edit: also, what word describes an expression that basically says "oh crap!"?
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Post by dinosauria101 on Apr 21, 2019 6:56:28 GMT 5
Maybe you could try fleshing out the story with or without the expression, then edit to the other way and choose which you see more fit.
That's what I've been doing with my 1st story here and it's worked rather well.
Infinity Blade on a side note, do you think that changing the plot of my 2nd story (Tarbosaurus glitched to Oligocene Mongolia, hunting Paraceratherium, enemy is Crocodylus bugtiensis) to when Paraceratherium was beginning to die off? Might that allow for more action in what happens to the Tarbosaurus? I'm not too sure.
Edit: That word would be 'fiddlesticks'.
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Post by theropod on Apr 21, 2019 16:13:46 GMT 5
I think upsizing it to 6-7m wouldn’t be too much of a stretch. Theropods that size likely existed in the Triassic based on the ichnological record (da Silva et al. 2012), although they seem to have been fairly rare. Griffin & Nesbitt (2019) also propose that the largest Triassic theropods could have reached sizes similar to Dilophosaurus or the like when adult. There might even be larger Liliensternus individuals out there, something pretty big has been discovered in Frick recently that has been guesstimated at 6 m, but it’s too early to say whether it really is a Liliensternus and whether that figure might have to be corrected by a meter or so.
da Silva, R.C., Barboni, R., Dutra, T., Godoy, M.M. and Binotto, R.B. 2012. Footprints of large theropod dinosaurs and implications on the age of Triassic biotas from Southern Brazil. Journal of South American Earth Sciences 39: 16–23.
Griffin, C.T. and Nesbitt, S.J. 2019. Does the maximum body size of theropods increase across the Triassic-Jurassic boundary? Integrating ontogeny, phylogeny, and body size. The Anatomical Record xx (accepted).
Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't Lillensternus too fragmentary to calculate size from? To my knowledge, it's only known from a few meager scraps of bone. No. The material of Liliensternus is quite substantial, absolutely sufficient for an approximate size estimate. There is a considerable portion of the vertebral collumn (giving us length), large parts of the limb girdles and limbs (giving us height), including complete femora and tibiae of both individuals, but also cranial material including an almost complete mandible (giving us skull length). That’s a lot better than for other large triassic theropods like Gojirasaurus and Zupaysaurus, at least if we only consider those parts that have actually been described ( Zupaysaurus does have more substantial remains than just a skull, but most of it is undocumented in the literature). von Huene, F. F. 1934: Ein neuer Coelurosaurier in der thüringischen Trias. Palaeontologische Zeitschrift 16:145–170. |
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Post by dinosauria101 on Apr 21, 2019 16:27:43 GMT 5
^You're right. I was mixing it up with Lophostropheus/Halticosaurus Iwhatever it's really called)
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Post by theropod on Apr 21, 2019 16:46:23 GMT 5
That has been tentatively considered Liliensternus airelensis in the past, but afaik the current valid name is Lophostropheus. Liliensternus liliensterni is the only species of Liliensternus currently considered valid.
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Post by creature386 on Apr 22, 2019 23:41:43 GMT 5
Chapter 2
Fabian saw how an adult Plateosaurus came to his clutch with strange green matter in its mouth which was not part of a Plateosaurus’ body. Every clutch had an adult that came with such a delivery. The adult Plateosaurus shook its jaws to let the fern’s leaflets descend like snowflakes. As if he was in an bird’s nest nest, all of Fabian’s siblings raised their mouths into the air and begged for a bite. Fabian did the same. He did not question it, no-one did. It had been programmed in his brain. Fabian caught a leaflet almost as long as himself. He had no teeth to make it smaller, he could only cramp it together in his mouth and gulp. He fell on his back. Fabian would not beg for more spinach today, but there was no need to. He just got his first taste of food. Little did he know that he would later have to fight for it rather than have it be spoon-fed, but it was best not to dwell on this with a full stomach. For the next time, a twig would do it.
Whether by instinct or by observations, Fabian recognized this Plateosaurus as his mother. The sentinel did not dedicate so much energy into one particular clutch.
His mother roared. It was not just her, every single one of the adults joined the choir. Some of them even roared up, even though there were no trees in front of them. None of the kids understood why. The answer lurked in the threshold between the forests and the river plain. It was an animal which looked like the darker twin of a Plateosaurus with a crest on its snout. Its body was not lime green like a Plateosaurus’, but more colored like a leaf in the twilight sky. The stripes went around its whole body, rather than just the back and were as dark as the night. If not for the scarlet crest, this animal would have been indistinguishable from the vegetation and its gaps in the forest night. But during the day, it could not escape the herd’s attention. It stepped out of its cover, the wind blowing through its hair-like plumage. Its teeth were more like those of a Proganochelys than of a Plateosaurus. Although, it would be an insult to compare these serrated blades to a turtle’s teeth. This animal was no Plateosaurus, not even a sauropod. It was a Liliensternus liliensterni.
Aconia came closer to it. She was no giant by Plateosaurus standards, but even she could look this beast in the eyes. If this was a fight one-on-one, the predator might have stood a chance, but against Aconia’s sisters, it wisely withdrew.
The Liliensternus strolled through the shrubs. Normally, he ducked to avoid the gnarly branches, but he was not in the mood to exert that much effort today. One of the branches carried a Peteinosaurus that flapped away just before his snout! The Liliensternus was not doing this for fun. There was nothing fun to have all this tasty meat swirl around his head like brainless flies all day. He had a wife and children to feed. In a clearing, a Liliensternus with a purple crest crouched with her hip, the end of her tail and the backs of her hands touching the mud. Her forelimbs might not even have touched the ground if this was not a slope. Such a bird-like resting posture has been recorded in ichnofossils left by Liliensternus’ Jurassic cousin Dilophosaurus. The mother uttered a roar that sounded like a high-pitched bird screech. In a gesture of submission, the father lowered his crest. It was the third time he came back home with no food this week.
Her twenty foot-sized hatchlings danced around the end of the slope. If Liliensternus was anything like its relative Coelophysis, it produced large numbers of relatively small eggs and invested about as much care in them as large reptiles do. Much like little crocodiles, these things were fairly independent. Despite this, mortality rates were high. One reason were high predation pressures. The other was that predators struggle more with acquiring food than prey do.
One of the hatchlings was especially hurt by the hunger. Her crest was mauve rather than the healthy lavender of her sisters. Much like eagles, little theropods competed for food when it was limited, so there were always those who were smaller and weaker than everyone else. Today, she would face one of her sisters who was among the most developed. Her crest was almost as dark purple as that of her mother. This unusually fast maturation earned her the name Lila.
Whether through mercy or through sheer hunger, Lila decided to end her sister’s suffering with a bite in the neck. Before the poor victim even knew what was going on, the other siblings took a bite, too. The forelimbs, the tail, nothing was safe. She could not even scream properly with her constricted windpipe.
The parents watched the tug-o-war over their daughter’s body parts. For them, it was just what kids do. At least they would have one less mouth to feed. They knew there was a deadline to gather as much food as possible before the day came where such acts of cannibalism would turn into a daily sight.
That day was the onset of the dry season.
During the dry season, the plains would grow and the forest shrink. The pterosaurs would migrate southwards, closer to the Tethys. With the shrinking lakes and the loss in thermoregulation, the days would become hotter and the nights cooler.
For Fabian, this was the first time in his life to spend a day without food. As a Plateosaurus’ bone microstructure indicates, these animals started life with enormous spurts of growth. It was their best line of defense against the predators of this world. His size had already doubled compared to the last time we visited him. He had learned to walk and used his ability to go to a bald tree around a waterhole. He dug the sand near the root for twigs. The twigs came to him once Aconia shook a branch to get some plant matter herself. She might not have reached the tree if this was still the day when Fabian hatched, even though she was already an adult. Like with modern reptiles, the growth of a Plateosaurus never quite stopped. It only slowed down.
The twig supply stopped. Fabian wondered if his mother was not hungry anymore. She went between her 15 remaining children and a hillside near the waterhole. Fabian was too young to understand that such landmarks were warning signs. Predators loved waterholes for the prey they lured closer and hillsides for the protection they offered. Any prey item worth survival should be immediately alert. Fabian did vaguely recall his first encounter with a Liliensternus. It was the day when he learned that getting enough food was not his sole concern and that not all breathing creatures were satisfied with the unmoving greens. Whatever his mother was worrying about, it was likely a predator, he could figure out that much.
Aconia focused to pick up seismic waves. However, she was experienced enough to know that predators strived to minimize sounds and that the hillside was out of hearing range. She reared up on her hindlimbs, but the rock was too tall to see what was behind it. The hillside was about 30 meters away. This might sound like much, but Aconia knew that a Liliensternus could close this distance in seconds and force her into an uncomfortable fight-or-flight situation. She could not flight with her offspring, yet she was too small to fight more than one Liliensternus on her own. Luckily, the herd was close. Liliensternuses preferred to isolate animals from the herd, perhaps this was the reason why they were not attacked yet. She called the sentry. As they went together to the hillside, their instincts proved correct.
Shielded by the granite, the crouching Liliensternus couple thought they could give their offspring a little hunting lesson. One juvenile with a purple and two with red crests remained. This time, the Liliensternus parents were both a foot or two longer than the 5 m long Aconia, not at length parity like last time they met. They were not afraid of her. However, the 8 m long sentry filled their hearts with terror. It looked as if it could take down 10 Liliensternuses. The predators ran away.
Lila got her first hunting lesson: Don’t let the food outsmart you! That, and the fact that she should not make noise during an ambush, though she hoped she was too small for the prey to hear.
The reason her parents had grown was different from why Aconia still grew: Her parents were not adults. While they were sexually mature, they still had unfused bones indicative of a subadult. Indeed, it is very well possible that most Triassic theropods known to us were subadults.
Once again, the family was without meat. At the waterhole’s shore lay a two meter long skeleton which used to belong to a hybodont shark. They had already ripped all meat from it.
Lila went to the pond. Perhaps the water could wash down her hunger. For all her thirst, Lila was not stupid. She did notice the murky figure lurking underwater that loomed towards the surface. It was a fugitive from the days when this world had still faced rain. An olive lungfish snapped out of the water. A Ceratodus. Thanks to her alert observation, she escaped with nothing worse than a bald spot in her plumage from the fish’s kiss. The Ceratodus ended up with little more than a mouth full of feathers. It was as long as a human leg. Lila was marginally shorter, but much more gracile. It could have easily drowned and then swallowed parts of her. For now, the fish pushed itself back into the water to escape from Lila’s parents. However, they did not go away. They wished to play a deadly game of cat and mouse. Unlike an African lungfish, Ceratodontiformes could not survive total water depletion.
Unless the rain came soon, the fish would die.
As harsh as this dry season was, at least the lakes persisted. At least the tougher ferns provided food even in the harsher times. At least the rain would come back and let the forests bloom again. Or so everyone thought. The storms this wet season were not what they used to be. They had no weather forecasts back then, they did not understand how our planet works. Little did they know about aerosols, albedo, water vapor, greenhouse gases or atmospheric and oceanic currents. However, besides these mundane reasons, there are more exotic reasons for temperature variability. Occasionally, oceanic currents just wreak havoc. The concept of an El Niño is well-known to mankind. The El Niño is an irregular occurrence which, when it happens, disrupts the cool Humboldt Currents at the coasts of Peru. As a results, temperatures creep up, plankton dies and food webs collapse from the bottom. The precipitation at the West coast of the Andes increases whilst the Amazonian rainforest suffers from droughts.
It is conceivable that prehistoric seas had similar events which dramatically disrupted global temperatures and precipitation levels.
This year, the warm current that should feed the Tethys failed to appear. With falling temperatures, less water evaporated and the so-called wet season was not much better than the dry season.
Fabian was done with his horsetail-leaf. By now, he was one year and four months old and almost two meters long. The adults had finally drunk up the waterhole. While Fabian had no idea what to do, he saw how everyone else was moving. The herd was not ready to sit this season through. They had to do it like the pterosaurs.
They had to migrate closer to the Tethys.
Yes, Fabian and Lila are supposed to mirror Alpha and Dragonfly with the genders reversed. Yes, Lila’s name is derived from Liliensternus with the purple crests serving as an ad hoc rationalization.
I’m running out of interesting species/genera BTW. Turns out Knollenmergen/Trossingen doesn’t offer much besides Plateosaurus. Ceratodus was basically just a Queensland lungfish in this story (including size and approximate coloration) since Wikipedia contained little information on Ceratodus.
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Post by Infinity Blade on Apr 23, 2019 18:45:53 GMT 5
Chapter 2 is out. I don't like this one as much, but next one will have them begin in the Paleocene, which I'll look more forward to writing. A New Actor Every Scene
Chapter 2
Hem’yoc was a bit puzzled. She stared at the dromaeosaurs and at Flurrd’kick for a few seconds before finally responding to the Acheroraptor.
“…H-how do I know this isn’t some trap you’ve set up for me?”
“If we were looking to kill you and weren’t forced to put up with this crap, we’d have killed you and your avian “sidekick” here right on the spot”, said the second Acheroraptor in a lower, even more menacing voice than the first. “And this tree’s pretty good cover to do so, at least until it gets blown to bits”.
“He’s…kiiinda got a point”, conceded Flurrd’kick. Unable to think of a counter herself, plus with the destruction of the tree they were hiding in by a chunk of rock that has reentered the atmosphere, Hem’yoc decided to follow the two Acheroraptor.
Upon reaching the cave, the little animals finally got a chance to thoroughly scan the landscape they were just running to escape from. Underneath a dark purplish sky, the land was thoroughly on fire, giving the landscape a bright orange hue all around. At least half of all the plants were being burnt to a crisp from the fire, and many trees were leveled, broken in half and burning. Chunks of rock of various sizes that were originally either part of the asteroid or pieces of Earth that had been blown off by the impact had been blasted upwards upon the impact, but were now making their way down to Earth again, causing mayhem and death. A few dinosaur corpses were visible from the entrance of the cave, either hit, crushed (to the point of severe mutilation), and burnt by a falling chunk of molten rock or burnt to death from having caught on fire. Only the waters seemed to have been safe from the hellfire, although surely some aquatic life had to have been smashed underneath some falling rocks. Indeed, one of the Acheroraptor saw in the distance a Champsosaurus resurface to survey the land, but failed to retreat into the lake quickly enough to avoid a massive rock heading his direction.
Agonizing shrieks, screams, and wails could be heard throughout Hell Creek, as if every inhabitant were somehow being tortured. Accompanying them were the additional bellows and roars of giant dinosaurs, along with the calls of some smaller creatures, which uncannily sounded like the cry of a baby. The four creatures standing at the entrance of the cave were quickly greeted by just one of the many sources of this awful cacophany of suffering: an Alphadon came scurrying towards the entrance of the cave eyeing Hem’yoc, Flurrd’kick, and the two Acheroraptor. The tiny mammal was on fire, being burnt alive.
With wide open, bloodshot eyes, it yelled “HELP ME!! HELP MEEEEE!!!!!”. Hem’yoc and Flurrd’kick screamed and recoiled back from the little metatherian moving towards them. The two Acheroraptor tried to think of a way to drive the Alphadon off, but could do little more than hiss at him, not wanting to catch on fire themselves.
“PLEASE HEL-“. The tiny mammal’s cries for help were cut off, and he finally dropped dead just before the entrance of the cave. The four stared at the burning corpse with varying degrees of shock and horror on their faces before finally heading further into the cave.
Upon reaching a huge section of the cave, they were finally greeted by the small mammal’s best friend.
“*GAAASP!!! Hem’yoc! You’re actually alive!”, the giant beast practically screamed in a youthful more cheerful than Hem’yoc’s. “And…Flurry’kick?”.
“Flurrd’kick”, the bird corrected.
“Right”. Chard’maw and Flurrd’kick didn’t know each other all that well, but the impression she got was that he was just some spunky, hyperactive, bird always looking for excitement, perhaps to a fault. Flurrd’kick just lumped her in with all the other monstrous, ferocious predators that roamed Hell Creek.
At four tonnes, Chard’maw wasn’t all that huge for a Tyrannosaurus rex. But she definitely had time to grow two or three tonnes more as expected for her species, four if either of her parents were anything to go by. The only surviving offspring of her parents’ brood, she was still part of a larger mob of Tyrannosaurus that her own parents led and would assemble whenever extremely large herds of Edmontosaurus or Triceratops passed by every now and then. Her name comes from an injury on the left side of her mouth; this side of her “lips” was scorched from an accident involving a small fire some years before the asteroid strike. The injury has since healed (it probably helped that the “lips” were covered in large, tough scales), but was replaced by scar tissue that becomes more visibly obvious the closer one comes to her face. Otherwise, she looked normal for a Tyrannosaurus, with a moderately dark purplish or reddish brown, scaly body with darker brown (almost black) stripes, covered with sparse feathering.
She was a very good friend to Hem’yoc, and once she realized who was or wasn’t present in the cave, she immediately realized what the situation really meant for Hem’yoc, and her face immediately contorted into one of those “oh crap” expressions.
“YOUR LITTER!!!”
“Chard’maw, I don’t know what I’m going to do! What if they’ve already been incinerated or killed by the ejecta?”, the mammal cried. “What if they were picked off by some scumbag predator??!! WHAT IF THEY LEFT THE BURROW AND GOT LOST???!!! WHAT IF-? WHAT IF-?”. Hem’yoc choked back sobs, just moments away from bawling out in distress.
“Shhh...it’ll be okay”, consoled the tyrannosaur, as Hem’yoc tightly held her giant snout. “Your pups have avoided danger in the burrow when you left them to find food before. Beasts of prey, thunderstorms, wildfires, they’ve hidden from them all. I bet they’re still safe in the burrow right now”.
“Yeah Hem, it’s gonna be alright!”, interjected Flurrd’kick. “You hear that? Less pieces of debris from the impact are coming down. Maybe you can go find your pups and bring them here!”.
Wanting to take advantage of the opportunity, Hem’yoc asked “Chard’maw, will you come out and help me find them?”.
“You sure they won’t be scared of some big-ass animal like me?”.
“You were there when they were born; they’ve smelled your scent not too long afterwards”, replied Hem’yoc. I think they’ll be fine, and even if they are scared of you, they have me”.
“Alright, let’s hop to it!”, Chard’maw cheerfully declared. Nervously looking up at the two Acheroraptor looking down at him, Flurrd’kick decided to tag along, leaving the dromaeosaurs sniggering.
“We’re gonna have some small snacks from the stash while you’re gone if you don’t mind!”, yelled out one of the Acheroraptor as the other already started eating, and as the rest headed out. The stash was there to help them weather out the ejecta; they had no idea of the global cloud of dust that would come later.
Sure enough, the ejecta were indeed coming down at a much slower rate than before, and would probably stop sooner or later. But Hell Creek was still indeed Hell on Earth, for fires still burned on. Walking through the landscape was a lot for the tyrannosaur’s sensitive nose to bear; the air was thick with the smell of burning corpses and vegetation. Hem’yoc and Flurrd’kick rode on Chard’maw’s back, her far greater size and thus far greater stride length covering more distance per a given time than the two small creatures ever could. Several minutes passed before they finally arrived at the burrow. But something was already in front of the burrow: an Anzu was probing the interior, and was grabbing something out of it. Upon sighting the caenagnathid, it took Hem’yoc, Flurrd’kick, and Chard’maw just a second to realize what was going on. And then, drowning out every other denizen’s cries for help and of suffering, a scream that sounded like it came out of some horror film monster erupted from the lungs of a distraught, scorned mother.
The Anzu was immediately startled by the scream, and fled as Chard’maw began pursuing him with Hem’yoc screaming bloody murder. He might have outrun the giant tyrannosaurid, had one of his feet not fallen into the abandoned, loosely covered burrow from one of Hem’yoc’s neighbors. Chard’maw grabbed the marauding dinosaur by the skin of her teeth and tossed him up into the air with her powerful neck muscles. The Anzu hit the ground hard, but far worse was Chard’maw subsequently crushing much of his body underfoot with one of the claws on her foot penetrating deeply into his upper body, forcing a manic scream from him. Flurrd’kick quickly descended from Chard’maw, quickly running to the inside of the burrow to check on the status of the litter while repeatedly and rapidly uttering, “OHMANOHMANOHMANOHMAN!!!”. Hem’yoc was not far behind.
Only one pup from the litter was left untouched: Bl’ckfurr, a melanistic pup. The unusual dark fur all over his body may have left the Anzu puzzled for a slight moment; this might have been the only reason he wasn’t devoured or killed during the assault. But while he may have survived the oviraptorosaur’s raid on the burrow, he was severely traumatized by it. Flurrd’kick shifted his attention to the Anzu while Hem’yoc attempted to console her remaining offspring (though, grieving over the rest of her now dead pups made that more difficult). Chard’maw figured that she may as well move her foot off the Anzu’s body; his body was so crushed and damaged, he wasn’t going to flee anywhere now. Flurrd’kick, and then a bloodlusted Hem’yoc then turned their attention to the caenagnathid. Her barely audible growl turned into a loud, hiss-like sound her species made when threatened or attacking another animal in defense, and she rushed toward’s the Anzu’s head. The oviraptorosaur attempted to bite back (literally), but she just went behind his head and starting gnawing and clawing at him, as he screeched. Being somewhat smaller and having no real means of grappling with the mammal, Flurrd’kick’s attempts to subdue her were futile, but Chard’maw easily gripped her with her front teeth (careful not to actually harm her friend) and gently set her down somewhere. Hem’yoc lay on the ground and began to sob again, as the Anzu weakly spoke the uncomfortable truth.
“I…I had to. All of Hell Creek is being totaled by the bits of the asteroid and the fire. Who knows how much food is going be left after everything’s been burnt to the ground?”, he said with equal parts suffering and venomous rebuke. Of course, this wasn’t something Hem’yoc wanted to hear, but as unfair as she thought the Anzu’s words were, she knew he was right. They all knew he was right. The only thing he did was remind them all of the harsh law of the jungle that had been governing animal life for literally hundreds of millions of years. A law Hem’yoc had been, and should have been well aware of for all of her life. But most of her children were now dead; she absolutely couldn’t help but think that this law of the jungle was the most unfair concept ever this time around. Hem’yoc just grabbed Bl’ckfurr with the front of her teeth and climbed back on top of Chard’maw’s back with Flurrd’kick, right after the tyrannosaur decided to put the Anzu out of his misery.
It’s as if the only reason the walk back to the cave felt so unpleasant for Hem’yoc was the sorrow from the tragedy that had just transpired: as if the fires weren’t still burning all around them. Upon reaching the cave, Hem’yoc decided to go straight to sleep, lying next to Chard’maw with Bl’ckfurr resting in her arms. Flurrd’kick wanted to see if he could find some small cave-dwelling invertebrates to eat before even the hyperactive creature with a high metabolism he was got some sleep. Hem’yoc didn’t seem to mind much at this. After all, the Anzu said it himself: he has to (especially considering the fact that no seeds or anything similar were in the cave). After the bird returned, Hem’yoc had already cried herself to sleep. The fires and whatever remaining ejecta was left falling down may blow over, but the death of most of her litter will stick with her forever. |
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Post by dinosauria101 on Apr 23, 2019 18:57:57 GMT 5
Pretty good, actually.
Infinity Blade have a happy birthday!
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Post by creature386 on Apr 23, 2019 21:51:15 GMT 5
Great chapter!
You did incorporate the landscape description I suggested and it could not have been better!
I especially liked the part with the Anzu. At first, it was set up as a straight-up villain, but then you showed that you were perfectly willing to explore the moral implications of all animals being sentient.
Moreover, your incorporation of obscure genera into a setting as well-known as Hell Creek continues to be amazing.
I'm a bit confused about the POV though. The first chapter sounded as if was written in omniscient while this one feels more like being in Hem’yoc's head. Not saying you can't do that (there are plenty of popular books like Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone that start with omniscient before zooming into the protagonist's head), just asking if that was your intent.
On a more minor note, I would have described that Chard’maw is a Tyrannosaurus right away. It sounded as if you were concealing this for a reveal which was rather pointless.
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Post by Infinity Blade on Apr 23, 2019 22:27:59 GMT 5
I was still trying to be omniscient (e.g. the view of the landscape wasn't from anyone's particular PoV, except mine), but I guess with the conflict regarding her litter, I ended up focusing on Hem'yoc some more.
I think I did that just to go against the reader's expectations a bit by having a T. rex (you know, a big, scary, vicious predator) of all things being friends with a tiny mammal. But I guess aside from that it wasn't really all that useful.
Hem'yoc and Flurrd'kick will wake up in the Paleocene in the beginning of the next chapter. I have a question, though: would it be best if I introduce the human scientist* and his motivation here, or should I do that later on in the story?
*Actually, just his voice. The way I imagine it, he'll speak through some high quality (sounding as if he were there in person), really tiny futuristic speaker floating somewhere out of the characters' sights; they'll physically see him in his own time period.
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Post by creature386 on Apr 23, 2019 22:39:07 GMT 5
I think I did that just to go against the reader's expectations a bit by having a T. rex (you know, a big, scary, vicious predator) of all things being friends with a tiny mammal. But I guess aside from that it wasn't really all that useful. I see. Perhaps the narrator should go more out of Hem'yoc's head and treat it more like a mystery then. It's a bit confusing otherwise because normally, important details should be described first. Hem'yoc and Flurrd'kick will wake up in the Paleocene in the beginning of the next chapter. I have a question, though: would it be best if I introduce the human scientist* and his motivation here, or should I do that later on in the story? *Actually, just his voice. The way I imagine it, he'll speak through some high quality (sounding as if he were there in person), really tiny futuristic speaker floating somewhere out of the characters' sights; they'll physically see him in his own time period. I'm in favor of doing that later. It would be good material for a big reveal and you did demonstrate the necessary foreshadowing skills with Chard’maw to pull it off. |
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Post by Infinity Blade on Apr 24, 2019 7:57:29 GMT 5
Hem'yoc and Flurrd'kick will wake up in the Paleocene in the beginning of the next chapter. I have a question, though: would it be best if I introduce the human scientist* and his motivation here, or should I do that later on in the story? *Actually, just his voice. The way I imagine it, he'll speak through some high quality (sounding as if he were there in person), really tiny futuristic speaker floating somewhere out of the characters' sights; they'll physically see him in his own time period. I'm in favor of doing that later. It would be good material for a big reveal and you did demonstrate the necessary foreshadowing skills with Chard’maw to pull it off. I realized that while I won't have the scientist tell Hem'yoc and Flurrd'kick that they're in the future right away, I think they'll need to realize that they are somehow in the future to come across the existential dilemma (and endure it along the way) I mentioned earlier. Otherwise, they might as well just think they're being transported to a bunch of alien planets where familiarity is limited and not think anything of it. Maybe in the Paleocene animals will have a somewhat hazy recollection of the K-Pg event (they may view it as a legend that may be true) and one of the animals will explain this and/or they'll notice the evolution of some fauna. I'll need to read up more on Paleocene fauna as well, or pick an exact date during that epoch for that matter. |
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