The MEG movie

[theropod]

IT’S JUST A MOVIE! Seriously, who cares about its box office? Did you bet money on it or something?

An 800 million prediction range when the lower end is 100 million is crappy accuracy. A 300 million prediction range, when your lower estimate is also 300 million is still crappy accuracy. That’s like estimating that the empire state building is 300-600 metres tall and claiming that since one of these estimates fits, it’s a good estimate. Or that saying the Giraffatitan lectotype is 23-46 m long represents a good estimate.
(Nothing personal, just trying to make a point about statistically significant estimates here, because I think it’s actually important for certain other topics.)

[creature386]

Sept 2, 2018 5:54:45 GMT 5 theropod said:

IT’S JUST A MOVIE! Seriously, who cares about its box office? Did you bet money on it or something?

An 800 million prediction range when the lower end is 100 million is crappy accuracy. A 300 million prediction range, when your lower estimate is also 300 million is still crappy accuracy. That’s like estimating that the empire state building is 300-600 metres tall and claiming that since one of these estimates fits, it’s a good estimate. Or that saying the Giraffatitan lectotype is 23-46 m long represents a good estimate.
(Nothing personal, just trying to make a point about statistically significant estimates here, because I think it’s actually important for certain other topics.)

Well, you could still say that you at least got the order of magnitude right which is in some contexts the best accuracy you can get.

[sam1]

I just saw the movie and it was actually even worse than I expected.
The Meg death scene is a straight up B-movie trash, I honestly was a bit stunned by how bad and stupid it was.

On a side note, I'm interested in box office in general..it gives a certain measure of the collective mindset and has some sociological implications.

[creature386]

Okay, I watched this yesterday (I always watch movies longer after they have failed out of relevance, why do you ask?) and it was exactly what I had expected. B-movie trash.

Much like Sam1, I believe understanding why this movie made so much money is an interesting sociological case study, as there is nothing even remotely remarkable about it.

On Discord, I shared real-time commentary while watching it. Obviously, it's not the most thought out critique possible, but this movie doesn't deserve better.

I'm not the best at this whole "snarky commentary" and this contains unavoidable spoilers (if such a movie can be spoiled at all), so read at your own discretion.

Let's start the MEG. Real-time commentary here.
[21:35]
First four minutes: A prologue where the Megalodon attacks a bunch of side characters. Predictable, but effective.
Not the best nor the worst of its kind I've ever seen.
[21:39]
Minute six: Okay, that woman is Chinese. You know the best joke one could crack in this situation? That no-one else understands Chinese. Hahahaha. High-brow humor in this movie so far.
[21:42]
7:15 Cool underwater shot.
[21:44]
Dialogue is also pretty cringe-worthy so far, just saying.

15 minutes and I don't care for a single character yet, not even the one that went missing. Maybe that'll change later.

Minute 16: Okay, this Megalodon can apparently take on nuclear submarines. Something to remember for vs-scenarios.
[21:56]
Minute 18-19: This bald guy is kinda awesome, I care for him. I hope he's the main character.

33th minute: I don't think any squid is a serious threat for a submarine.
[22:11]
Megalodon just saved Suyin. Is this one of those movies where the monster only goes after the bad guys (or alternatively only after the men)?
[22:16]
38th minute: First death and it's a guy. Kinda expected it.
[22:23]
Okay, the bald guy is called Jonas and he's basically your super generic asshole male Hollywood hero. I guess Suyin is gonna be his love interest. Their interactions so far are at least stuff I've already seen hundreds of times before.
[22:24]
Glad that we got to the Megalodon, but 21 to 27 m? Why?
[22:27]
The hype Megalodon is receiving is ridiculous, too. As if we didn't have weapons to kill this thing with.

It's literally as if Max Hawthrone wrote the script. Unlike with The Wandering Earth, I can at least comprehend what's happening.

Minute 51-52: Jonas has to fight the Megalodon in the water on his own for filmsy reasons. The movie needs an excuse to prove how manly he is. Well, I guess he's at least gonna fail somehow because there's still an hour of runtime left.
[22:40]
Minute 54: Yeah, he's in trouble.
[22:41]
And, he got out in the most predictable way imaginable.

I'm halfway done and the Megalodon appears dead. I hope there's either a second one or it's not really dead as that'd be super cheap.
[22:57]
"We did what people always do: Discover and then destroy." OMG, WHAT A DEEP MOVIE!!!! I've never heard this message before!

1 hour and 7 minutes and there's a second Meg who eats the dead one.
[22:59]
And the second Megalodon just toppled over a ship like the Kronosaurus from Kronos Rising. Cheap, but makes me curious.

I'm 2/3 done. Let's hope the climax comes soon. They already passed the obligatory lowest point with Megalodon destroying the ship and all.
Dear Lord, even an obligatory cliché parent death must be shoehorned in.
[23:14]
The Chinese government sends destroyer-class war ships after the Megalodon. I'm sure not even that is gonna work...
[23:20]
...and I was right. The Megalodon't plot armor is so thick that not even helicopter bombs stand a chance, even though they could track it in the water.

1 hour and 32 minutes: Of course the Meg leaves the prey it has already cornered for some vaguely distant whale because otherwise, we won't have a climax.

So, Jonas kills this invincible kaiju shark is by stabbing it so hard in the eye that it dies? SERIOUSLY?
[23:38]
And suddenly, a trillon sharks come out of nowhere to eat the Meg so that Suyin can save Jonas.
[23:42]
Don't know how I should rate this. This movie was cliché, nonsensical and filled with stupid characters, but at least I understood what's going on. I gave The Wandering Earth two out of five stars and that movie had no plot. How should I rate the MEG? 2/5 or 1/5?

(Someone then suggested I should give one out of five stars)

Fair enough.

[kekistani]

Jul 19, 2020 13:11:06 GMT 5 creature386 said:

Okay, I watched this yesterday (I always watch movies longer after they have failed out of relevance, why do you ask?) and it was exactly what I had expected. B-movie trash.

Much like Sam1, I believe understanding why this movie made so much money is an interesting sociological case study, as there is nothing even remotely remarkable about it.

On Discord, I shared real-time commentary while watching it. Obviously, it's not the most thought out critique possible, but this movie doesn't deserve better.

I'm not the best at this whole "snarky commentary" and this contains unavoidable spoilers (if such a movie can be spoiled at all), so read at your own discretion.

Let's start the MEG. Real-time commentary here.
[21:35]
First four minutes: A prologue where the Megalodon attacks a bunch of side characters. Predictable, but effective.
Not the best nor the worst of its kind I've ever seen.
[21:39]
Minute six: Okay, that woman is Chinese. You know the best joke one could crack in this situation? That no-one else understands Chinese. Hahahaha. High-brow humor in this movie so far.
[21:42]
7:15 Cool underwater shot.
[21:44]
Dialogue is also pretty cringe-worthy so far, just saying.

15 minutes and I don't care for a single character yet, not even the one that went missing. Maybe that'll change later.

Minute 16: Okay, this Megalodon can apparently take on nuclear submarines. Something to remember for vs-scenarios.
[21:56]
Minute 18-19: This bald guy is kinda awesome, I care for him. I hope he's the main character.

33th minute: I don't think any squid is a serious threat for a submarine.
[22:11]
Megalodon just saved Suyin. Is this one of those movies where the monster only goes after the bad guys (or alternatively only after the men)?
[22:16]
38th minute: First death and it's a guy. Kinda expected it.
[22:23]
Okay, the bald guy is called Jonas and he's basically your super generic asshole male Hollywood hero. I guess Suyin is gonna be his love interest. Their interactions so far are at least stuff I've already seen hundreds of times before.
[22:24]
Glad that we got to the Megalodon, but 21 to 27 m? Why?
[22:27]
The hype Megalodon is receiving is ridiculous, too. As if we didn't have weapons to kill this thing with.

It's literally as if Max Hawthrone wrote the script. Unlike with The Wandering Earth, I can at least comprehend what's happening.

Minute 51-52: Jonas has to fight the Megalodon in the water on his own for filmsy reasons. The movie needs an excuse to prove how manly he is. Well, I guess he's at least gonna fail somehow because there's still an hour of runtime left.
[22:40]
Minute 54: Yeah, he's in trouble.
[22:41]
And, he got out in the most predictable way imaginable.

I'm halfway done and the Megalodon appears dead. I hope there's either a second one or it's not really dead as that'd be super cheap.
[22:57]
"We did what people always do: Discover and then destroy." OMG, WHAT A DEEP MOVIE!!!! I've never heard this message before!

1 hour and 7 minutes and there's a second Meg who eats the dead one.
[22:59]
And the second Megalodon just toppled over a ship like the Kronosaurus from Kronos Rising. Cheap, but makes me curious.

I'm 2/3 done. Let's hope the climax comes soon. They already passed the obligatory lowest point with Megalodon destroying the ship and all.
Dear Lord, even an obligatory cliché parent death must be shoehorned in.
[23:14]
The Chinese government sends destroyer-class war ships after the Megalodon. I'm sure not even that is gonna work...
[23:20]
...and I was right. The Megalodon't plot armor is so thick that not even helicopter bombs stand a chance, even though they could track it in the water.

1 hour and 32 minutes: Of course the Meg leaves the prey it has already cornered for some vaguely distant whale because otherwise, we won't have a climax.

So, Jonas kills this invincible kaiju shark is by stabbing it so hard in the eye that it dies? SERIOUSLY?
[23:38]
And suddenly, a trillon sharks come out of nowhere to eat the Meg so that Suyin can save Jonas.
[23:42]
Don't know how I should rate this. This movie was cliché, nonsensical and filled with stupid characters, but at least I understood what's going on. I gave The Wandering Earth two out of five stars and that movie had no plot. How should I rate the MEG? 2/5 or 1/5?

(Someone then suggested I should give one out of five stars)

Fair enough.

Wasn't the thingy Jonas stabbed the big meg with in the eye full of poison?

[creature386]

I don't remember. If it was, it worked oddly fast and through an odd vector.